26 Comments
User's avatar
Maggie Harris's avatar

There are so many nuggets of gold in here and such a good read. And we’ve read a lot of the same kind of research (from which I, personally, like to quote wildly inaccurate statistics from, because I can never remember the numbers). I read once that 60%* of men will apply for a job they aren’t fully qualified for, whereas roughly the same percentage of women will wait until they’re fully qualified (or just never apply). Men are more likely to ask for a pay rise than women. In freelancing, women are far less likely to raise their rates. Etc etc.

My first paid freelance gig was for a very high-end jeweller and she asked me if I’d written jewellery copy before. I said yep sure (I was once an area manager for a jewellery firm…I figured it was only a small stretch of the truth). I went home and wrote a sample from scratch. She was thrilled. 6 months later I quit my job and was making more money as a writer than I’d ever made in the [shudders] corporate world.

Yours is a message for ~ everyone ~ but I think it’s an especially good one for women, who are so prone to underestimating themselves.

*example of wildly inaccurate quoting of statistics

Expand full comment
Alexander J. Porter's avatar

You're so right - this is a message that is so valuable for women (I was kinda shocked at the stat I found about women asking for and receiving a pay rise!).

Also, your origin story about quitting the corporate rat race and tumbling into writing fills me with actual joy 😄

Expand full comment
Ananya's avatar

I was about to say the exact same thing and statistic. Women are statistically more risk averse than men. Wonder where this behaviour stems from 🤔

Expand full comment
Alec McNayr's avatar

I came for the advice but stayed for the image captions. Great story.

Expand full comment
Alexander J. Porter's avatar

Haha, thank you! What the Lord taketh in artistic ability, Canva giveth.

Expand full comment
Alec McNayr's avatar

I read about that in 2 Canvanthians

Expand full comment
Ananya's avatar

Your humour is a cherry on the top of your beautiful words and insights. :)

Expand full comment
Alexander J. Porter's avatar

Thank you! Now I'm in the mood for cherries (so thank you for that, too!).

Expand full comment
Fabienne Mannherz's avatar

Alex, after reading the title and especially the subtitle, I didn't imagine "The Trip to Amsterdam" being one of the most "sincere and serious" aspects of the entire post :D Well done plot twist. Although I was really looking forward to a different kind of Amsterdam story :D

Expand full comment
Alexander J. Porter's avatar

Truthfully, there are some stories from a Christmas Day trip to Amsterdam's Red Light District that my mother would be mortified to learn. Lucky she isn't on Substack, haha.

Expand full comment
Fabienne Mannherz's avatar

I have a story of a "slightly gone wrong" Amsterdam trip, which includes my parents, too. So in this family, we don't talk about Amsterdam, no, no, no :D :D :D

Expand full comment
Alexander J. Porter's avatar

Well now I’m even more curious, haha!

Expand full comment
Fabienne Mannherz's avatar

It might or might not have involved my dad, brother and me munching on some cake on a market while my mum just watched in slight suspicion, but all she wanted was continue her shopping trip…and so a story unfolded 🤣

Expand full comment
Elliott San's avatar

Love it. Extreme poker face while asking for more money is truly, great advice. (Because they always have it...)

Expand full comment
Alexander J. Porter's avatar

And it'll bloody cost 'em more to go through the process of finding someone to replace you. Hold the line Elliott, we'll get what we're owed yet!

Expand full comment
Veronica's avatar

The only mattress I'll ever have contact with is the one I sleep on. Otherwise, spot-on advice, young sensei!

Expand full comment
Alexander J. Porter's avatar

So you'd never be interested in working in a mattress factory then???

Expand full comment
Veronica's avatar

Well, if I did, I'd make the queen-size mattresses and put on the "Do not remove under penalty of law" tags!

Expand full comment
kaylen alexandra's avatar

I woke up on the wrong side of the mattress and I came to substack looking for joy. Jackpot. Right here. ✨

Expand full comment
Alexander J. Porter's avatar

I have a feeling you charm mattress makers left, right and centre. Hope you're setting high standards and smashing goals :)

Expand full comment
kaylen alexandra's avatar

🥹 Ty & I know you’re already doing the same, this is your reminder to never change.

Expand full comment
Neetu's avatar

Excellent life advice. Love reading your take on life. Also made me LOL 😆

Expand full comment
Alexander J. Porter's avatar

Neetu, if I can elicit a single chuckle from you then I'm doing something right.

Expand full comment
Colin Cerniglia's avatar

Cool story. Thanks for sharing! It’s gives an interesting spin on how to deal with potential rejection but also highlights how awesome life can be if you do more than dream!

Expand full comment
Alexander J. Porter's avatar

Always strive to win over the mattress maker, Colin!

Expand full comment
Kate Darracott's avatar

That's hilarious! 👏

I was actually thinking of doing the same thing with my Gap Year, in that I would go for wildly inappropriate, high paying jobs, start them and see how long I could wing it for!

And if it wan't for this damned lethargy, I may have done it. 😉

Expand full comment